Forgiveness.

Forgiveness is such a taboo subject in our world. And this is mainly because people force forgiving and forgetting into the same category. I don't believe they belong together. I don't think there is any credibility in the old saying "Forgive and forget." Forgiving does not mean letting someone off the hook for what they have done to you. Forgiving is simply allowing yourself to acknowledge that an action hurt you, and then to let the person who did the hurting know that they hurt you. It puts the ball into their court so to speak. I ran across a quote by Lewis Smedes that really helped me with forgiveness, and I'm going to share it with you now. "When we forgive evil we do not excuse it, we do not tolerate it, we do not smother it. We look evil full in the face, call it what it is, let its horror shock and stun and enrage us, and only then do we forgive it." 

In forgiving an act done towards us, we are calling it what it is. Something that hurt. Letting the other person know they have hurt you, and that you have forgiven them for that pain. A lot of people I have talked to who have been deeply hurt hold out on forgiveness because of the fact that they are not ready to forget. Some things can never be forgotten. But by holding on to the pain, you cause it to rule you. Run your life, and let the person who wronged you stay in control. Forgiving them is gaining back that control, and letting go of the bitterness that might have stopped you from forgiving. Just my thoughts on the subject.